Pauline,
Probably the same advice as for any dog: love him, explore his abilities, accept his limitations and see where it gets you. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
As a rather silly take on the show vs working debate, we present:
That's Just Not Chowder!
"Hi, this is Joe Harrow and welcome ladies and gentlement to the 100th New England Chowder Show. As you all know I'm sure, chowder nourished generations of our ancestors as they won a living from the sea and we're most proud to be keeping up this sustaining tradition.
With me now is this year's winner in the clam chowder division, Mrs. Eunice Digglesby, who won with ther 'Boston Fog Dreams VIII.' Mrs. Digglesby, tell us exactly what your chowder won on."
"Why thank you, young man. Yes, my chowder was praised especially for the perfect uniformity of the all natural fresh-farmed clams I used, its luminescent whitness 'like alabaster' Judge Brower called it, its pourability and most of all, its perfect see-fresh tang that they said really evoked the best of the tradition. I've worked fifteen years in my kitchen and I'm very glad to see all that hard work finally pay off."
"Mmm, sounds great <Mrs. Digglesby bows head modestly> So, can I taste it?"
"Most certainly not! What do you take us for? Chowder-heads? We support the best tradition of the New England fishermen. Those chowder-heads do terrible things. Some of them actually add pepper to their chowders. Can you imagine it, marring the wholesome whiteness of the chowder? It's so ugly. They don't pay attention to the uniformity of the ingredients they use. And they even *mix* their shellfish."
"Hi! I'm Joe Harrow and today I'm interviewing Mr. Samuel Fogg of Practical Chowder, who advocates the eating of chowder. Mr Fogg, some people argue that your chowders are not truly representative of the sorts that nourished New England fishermen. What do you have to say to that?"
"Nonsense. You'll notice that the chowder show people don't actually eat their stuff. That's because they're anywhere from insipid to disgusting. Some of them add stuff like white paint and gelatin just to get that whiteness and pourability."
"But your chowders don't have a sea-fresh tang."
"Would you really want to eat something that smells of raw fish and sewage?"
From Julie Nevitt, new chowder owner: "Dear Mr. Harrow, I write to object to the biased coverage you gave the last show. As the proud owner one gallon of prime traditional chowder that I bought from the most reputable chowder show, I can assure you that not only do I have an aesthetically pleasing chowder that is a fine addition to my kitchen, but it can nourish me should I ever require it to."
Naturally, the less said about the misguided people who try for the show chowder that's actually edible, the better. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />
Dei, incorrigible chowderhead.
PS: Fortunately, most people still know that food is for eating.
PPS: On the off-hand chance that this has amused you, this may be freely reposted so long as you credit it.
The plural of anecdote is not data.
-- Stephen Budiansky.