Hi Guys,

For the recall I use the command "aqui!" (Portuguese for "here!"). I use it until now only while training a recall, never when they are offline in the yard.

For the Restrained Recall I put a harness on the dog - as described in Mark's course. For the other Recall the dog is on a long line.

But now my husband uses now the command "aqui!" too, whenever he wants a dog come to him. I told him that like this he was abusing this command, he will make it meaningless for the dog, because he has the chance to decide if he wants to go on doing what is is doing at the moment or not.And running after the dog of cause makes no sense. On the long line he hasn't got that chance.

I have trained it first on a shorter line, so they can not go away very far. And then of course with the Restrained recall. Like this the learned to understand the meaning of "Aqui" as a friendly invitation to have fun together.

I have already had quite hot confrontations with my husband about this. His opinion: I'm taking these things much too seriously and that the dogs will anyway never come on command, when they have more important things to do!

Of course, when there is some too high an attraction competing with me, they will prefer this. That's why we are training. They do come to me quite reliably in a training session. They are still in a learning phase and I can add distractions only gradually.IMO, this coming, when called must through 100'000 reps become a pattern.

But when the "Aqui" looses its meaning, this will never happen. They will think: "Ok, she is near, I can still do what I want now and join her afterwards". In this way I will never be able to reach consistency and an engagement, which is stronger than the competing motivators I am working against corresponding to the dog's momentary level of tolerance.

I know, no one (except perhaps I myself) can solve this husband problem. Probably I should apply a marker training for him too. Though 4 dogs are already enough work.

But - without joke - am I so wrong with my opinion?

Any tips, tricks, advices, rat runs, opinions will be very welcome!

 Quote: Christina Stockinger

Hi Guys,

For the recall I use the command "aqui!" (Portuguese for "here!"). I use it until now only while training a recall, never when they are offline in the yard.

For the Restrained Recall I put a harness on the dog - as described in Mark's course. For the other Recall the dog is on a long line.

But now my husband uses now the command "aqui!" too, whenever he wants a dog come to him. I told him that like this he was abusing this command, he will make it meaningless for the dog, because he has the chance to decide if he wants to go on doing what is is doing at the moment or not.And running after the dog of cause makes no sense. On the long line he hasn't got that chance.

I have trained it first on a shorter line, so they can not go away very far. And then of course with the Restrained recall. Like this the learned to understand the meaning of "Aqui" as a friendly invitation to have fun together.

I have already had quite hot confrontations with my husband about this. His opinion: I'm taking these things much too seriously and that the dogs will anyway never come on command, when they have more important things to do!

Of course, when there is some too high an attraction competing with me, they will prefer this. That's why we are training. They do come to me quite reliably in a training session. They are still in a learning phase and I can add distractions only gradually.IMO, this coming, when called must through 100'000 reps become a pattern.

But when the "Aqui" looses its meaning, this will never happen. They will think: "Ok, she is near, I can still do what I want now and join her afterwards". In this way I will never be able to reach consistency and an engagement, which is stronger than the competing motivators I am working against corresponding to the dog's momentary level of tolerance.

I know, no one (except perhaps I myself) can solve this husband problem. Probably I should apply a marker training for him too. Though 4 dogs are already enough work.

But - without joke - am I so wrong with my opinion?

Any tips, tricks, advices, rat runs, opinions will be very welcome!

IMHO, it would be Much Easier for you to "work smarter NOT harder" by changing YOUR come command to !Here! or !Come! instead, and just letting your Husband carry on as he pleases (digging his heals in, just to assert himself) LOL.

Lol! It seems Lol, but really, this doesn't work. A dog will rapidly learn, that "aqui" is without importance. This is not a question between two people beeing of different opinions. It is a question. of being consistent. He hardly ever cares anout the dogs. (correcrtion , je vares, he cares but doesn't do anything with them( Means I only can go my way.

What counts here is, that a dog gets clear commandos and not a confusion of all possible sounds, once friendly, once annoyed, once a som of almost threatening. In this manner they will catch nothing at all, they will not understand nothin,.that's what I wanted to say.

Unless he would use his personal sounds connsistently with them. Dogs are intelligent enough to associiate this with each person. But then they would have to do this consistently, not as exception, out of momentary emotion, not as a personal momentary wish. This absolutey confuses the dogs, doesn't work in the least.

He shouts in all possible sounds and I cannot do anything against it. This cannot be the way which makes sense, make undertand them how to react.

Thank you so much for paying so much attention!

 Quote: Christina Stockinger

Lol! It seems Lol, but really, this doesn't work. A dog will rapidly learn, that "aqui" is without importance. This is not a question between two people beeing of different opinions. What counts here is, that a dog gets clear commandos and not a confusion of all possible sounds, once friendly, once annoyed, once a som of almost threatening. In this manner they will catch nothing at all, they will not understand nothing.

Unless he would use his personal sounds connsistently with them. Dogs are intelligent enough to associiate this with each person. but then they would have to do this consistently, not as exception, out of momentary emotion, not as a personal momentary wish. This absolutey confuses the dogs, doesn't work in the least.

He shouts in all possible sounds and I cannot do anything against it. This cannot be the way which makes sense, make undertand them how to react.

UH-OH, then I conclude that your only viable option is DIVORCE (just kidding of course) but I live alone with my pets, so I have no advice on "How to Train a Husband"

ETA: However, there are plenty of households in which The Dogs WILL OBEY One Spouse but DISOBEY The OTHER -- And none of those dogs are at all "confused" over the Meaning of their Commands ... Canines know perfectly well WHOM They Must MIND and Whom they can Ignore, all the while distinguishing precisely between what it REALLY means when The Boss says, "!AQUI", and what it only means when the other guy says, "!Aqui!".

If it makes you feel better I think it's probable that it will work itself out eventually.
In my house my husband or daughters will try to give Aries commands or scold him using his name in a mad tone, when I only use it to get his attention. He just ignores them. My husband likes to use it as a party trick. He'll tell Aries to do something over and over to no avail then I will quietly give him the command from across the room, which he minds. He has tuned in specially to my voice and fluctuations and, because I am the one that puts all the work into him, I am the one he is bonded to.

Of course Aries was my valentine gift so what I say goes, and I can keep that to a minimum. My family laughs because I won't even let anyone else walk him.
Then again, in his basics learning phase as a young pup, I wouldn't let anyone go near him until I was satisfied that he understood me. The exception was my, then, 5 year old.

I still think that it will likely work out for you. You put a lot of work into them, and I'm sure they will figure out what you are saying and just read your husband's tone and body language. It will probably make it more difficult for you though.

Thanks, candi, your very sweet and additionally you know a lot more about dogs than I old witch, who had always to struggle for everything - like during 3 years for the kennels.
I do believe absolutely what you are saying and I^d accept my husbands other way of training the dogs, if he were training at all. Problem: there is no way, he just makes a big mess. We are not in a big war because of this, but it really creates a confusion.
Thanks so much for your attention! Getting feedback actually helps to make see things a bit easier. Nevertheless, I'll kill him, if he goes on using that bloody commando! Grrrr!

 Quote: Christina Stockinger

Thanks, candi, your very sweet and additionally you know a lot more about dogs than I old witch, who had always to struggle for everything - like during 3 years for the kennels.
I do believe absolutely what you are saying and I^d accept my husbands other way of training the dogs, if he were training at all. Problem: there is no way, he just makes a big mess. We are not in a big war because of this, but it really creates a confusion.
Thanks so much for your attention! Getting feedback actually helps to make see things a bit easier. Nevertheless, I'll kill him, if he goes on using that bloody commando! Grrrr!

LOL, maybe your husband is just using this issue to act out some "passive aggression" due to his being jealous over the dogs because of all the time you lavish on Them instead of Him (ha-ha)

 Quote: Candi Campbell

 Quote: Christina Stockinger

Lol! It seems Lol, but really, this doesn't work. A dog will rapidly learn, that "aqui" is without importance. This is not a question between two people beeing of different opinions. What counts here is, that a dog gets clear commandos and not a confusion of all possible sounds, once friendly, once annoyed, once a som of almost threatening. In this manner they will catch nothing at all, they will not understand nothing.

Unless he would use his personal sounds connsistently with them. Dogs are intelligent enough to associiate this with each person. but then they would have to do this consistently, not as exception, out of momentary emotion, not as a personal momentary wish. This absolutey confuses the dogs, doesn't work in the least.

He shouts in all possible sounds and I cannot do anything against it. This cannot be the way which makes sense, make undertand them how to react.

UH-OH, then I conclude that your only viable option is DIVORCE (just kidding of course) but I live alone with my pets, so I have no advice on "How to Train a Husband"

ETA: However, there are plenty of households in which The Dogs WILL OBEY One Spouse but DISOBEY The OTHER -- And none of those dogs are at all "confused" over the Meaning of their Commands ... Canines know perfectly well WHOM They Must MIND and Whom they can Ignore, all the while distinguishing precisely between what it REALLY means when The Boss says, "!AQUI", and what it only means when the other guy says, "!Aqui!".

Ditto on this!

It may take a dog a bit longer to be solid but it WILL learn that it can't get away from obeying one who is consistent.

Aside from me my 9yr old grandson (youngest of 5 g-kids) has more control over my dogs then anyone else in the family.

Not that the dogs disobey the rest but the dogs respond instantly to me and the grandson.

Both of my daughter's have two dogs and who they respond to varies as to how quickly they respond.

Drives me up a wall but their dogs still mind better then most anyone elses I know.

I should be happy with that huh?


Now with any man/husband/partner I think marker training will work if the reward has a high enough value.

Thank you all so much for your great answers. Makes me feel a lot better.
By the way, Bob, my husband payed some rounds after reading this!!!

Bob, have you been marker trained? Congrats to your wife!
W2hat was the high value reward? No answer needed.