(Cliffnotes at bottom)

Hi everyone! My name is Laurel and I'm a college student heading home for Spring Break today, and I wanted a little help with trying to help/inform my family.

My family has a Boston Terrier that they got 2 years ago. Our Dog The breeder bred her lines to be highly athletic, muscled, friendly dogs. Anyway, our dog has been cooped up inside the house almost its whole life, it goes outside to pee and occasionally goes on trips with my family to visit relatives but that's about it. It doesn't get anywhere near the exercise it needs and has developed a ball obsession (not just ball drive, outright obsession). It's started to growl and snap at family members, even my brother who is 18 and she usually repects (she actually bit him when he was just petting her while she had the ball). She's naturally about a low-medium level of natural dominance and is generally a soft dog most of the time.

Because of my family's disregard and general busy-ness and the ball obsession she doesn't get that much real human interaction. Also, except when I'm home, she doesn't really have a pack structure. She respects my dad but no one really interacts with her so he life is pretty much controlled by her and she runs around the house trying to find someway to entertain herself.
Another thing is she is very fearful/aggressive at strangers and has almost zero socialization with any other dogs. She's only really known her littermates, so she's downright scared of other living beings outside.

So I want to get her out and take her places but my parents are afraid she'll catch some random disease (she had her puppy shots, but no boosters, I'm trying to explain Vaccinosis but no-go so far). So basically the little dog has a huge amount of energy and no way to express it and is not allowed to get out of the house because "she'll catch something."

I've started on marker training (using a clicker so I can teach them how to do it instead of trying to get them to say "yes" only once and with the same inflection every time), and she's responding very well. I'd like to teach her some cute tricks this week so my parents may take notice and maybe change their attitude a little bit about how maybe she could be more than a furniture ornament. We have a local agility club with agility equipment set up in a certain part of the dog park for everyone to use for free so we wouldn't even have to buy any ourselves.

Anyway, I just want to give this little dog a better life experience cause she's going crazy, but I can't outright tell my parents point blank. I also need them to see that she is getting even more aggressive and that it could soon become a real problem. She's not going to be a hard dog to correct, but I'm at college so they're going to need to be the ones to follow through. I need a strategy and I have one week...at least until summer.
Cliffnotes:

Dog gets no exercise.

Dog is undersocialized, territorial, and aggressive.

Dog has a ball obsession.

Dog is starting to growl and snap at family members.

Parents won't acknowledge.

Sounds just like my first dog. I am so ashamed at how that poor dog lived for 11 years.

I was ignorant. Knew nothing about dog behavior or psychology. Cesar Millan opened my eyes. I'm not pushing his approach over anyone else's. It was available to me in a nonthreatening entertaining manner on my TV in the comfort of my own home. I still watch every single episode because I catch something new each time. Much of it is found here, too. Get them to watch some episodes.

Get out the clicker and show them how to do it with your dog. Show them how much happier she can be. I wish I'd had a daughter to show me the way. We all would have been happier.

Get them to listen to the podcasts here and read some of the free e-books, too. The marker/clicker training is something we all can do when we see how well it works.

Your dog is a cutie. Good luck and have a safe and sane Spring Break.

Edited by Mariellena Simon (03/12/2010 01:41 PM)
Edit reason: ETA

Last visit I went home I taught her the "touch" with the palm and they liked that. I'd just like to open their eyes to the dog's needs, then I really believe they'll have a much more enjoyable time with her.

I just see myself running into the same argument every time: "I just don't have the time."

 Quote: laurel hamby

I just see myself running into the same argument every time: "I just don't have the time."

Laurel,

I respect what you are trying to do very much, especially how you are trying to show by example rather than preach.

However, if they are just going to say, "just don't have the time...", perhaps it's time to start talking to them about finding a home for the dog that would be a better fit and actually provide it with a life? Doesn't sound like there's much space in their lives for a dog.

The problem in your situation is that it's not how you present the information, or the content of what you share, it's that they're just not interested.

JMO

leih

Do they want help?

I sense an awkward, tense spring break at the Hamby's.:wink:

Laurel, You are to be commended for being so concerned about this young dog.

A few random thoughts...

I would not want to be in your shoes. Most parents don't take advice, especially unsolicited advice, from their children... It is going to be more how you say things - not what you say. JMO.

The concern they have over some vague, random illness does not compute with the lack of concern about a dog living a completely unnatural life...

Do your parents live in an area where you could find pet sitter/ trainer to come in daily and at least exercise / train the dog in her own back yard?

 Quote:

However, if they are just going to say, "just don't have the time...", perhaps it's time to start talking to them about finding a home for the dog that would be a better fit and actually provide it with a life? Doesn't sound like there's much space in their lives for a dog.

They really don't have a lot of extra time (they are busy), but that convo would go nowhere fast because they really do like her a lot and she's purebred and was kind of expensive. However, I do have 3 siblings. My brother who is 18 has plenty of time on his hands and would be very capable of training her and enforcing pack structure rules with the younger ones. The younger two are 8 and 7 and could do a great job throwing the ball and giving her exercise!

 Quote:

I would not want to be in your shoes. Most parents don't take advice, especially unsolicited advice, from their children... It is going to be more how you say things - not what you say. JMO.

The concern they have over some vague, random illness does not compute with the lack of concern about a dog living a completely unnatural life...

Do your parents live in an area where you could find pet sitter/ trainer to come in daily and at least exercise / train the dog in her own back yard?

I already know I'd have to approach pretty much everything through my Mom and my siblings...they're pretty open to everything. I think awareness is the big thing but it may also be the hardest to approach. But it wouldn't take much to really help the dog. Just a little more clear pack structure, exercise, and meaningful interaction and she'll be right as rain!

Yeah I still don't get how to allieve fears about random diseases.

And a pet sitter/trainer/walker would be a "luxury" commodity right now. If I were here permenantly I would do it all myself.

From my perspective as daughter I see that they love the little dog a lot, but they don't really know what she needs other than food, shelter, and the discipline not to pee on the carpet.

I guess I'm looking for simple, little changes and a good way to introduce those to them. I know I can't get any one of them to sit through Ed's Basic Dog Obedience dvd (4 hours - "I don't have time!" kinda thing). Is there a good, succinct video I could show? I have a Cesar Millan dvd "People Training for Dogs."

Just looking for ideas, I don't want to change their world or force anything. They do want what's best for the dog, I guess I just can't be the one to say it?

...wow, that's a novel, sorry!

As far as theit fear of unknown diseases, why not ask your vet to talk to them and alleviate their fears, as well as discuss the benefits and risks of at least the core vacinations. You might want to print out Dr. Jean Dodd's protocol to discuss with your vet and parents. http://www.weim.net/emberweims/Vaccine.html Perhaps, if they made an informed decision in conjuction with their vet and the above protocol regarding whether or not to give the dog any further vaccinations they would realize that any risk of disease is actually very very small and much much less than the risk of the dog being put down for biting someone due to it's fear caused by a lack of proper socialization.

Personally I think vaccinations have a place but it's just that we've gotten so paranoid that we way over do it today and seem to be told we need to vaccinate against everything from deadly diseases to hang nails. When I was growing up dogs were given their puppy shots and one adult booster. And, unless their was a serious outbreak of something, that was it other than rabies.

Maybe approach it upbeat. Like--"hey, a friend who has a BT turned me on to a bunch of info...did you know they were bred for x....her dog does this and that, etc." So what if it's a fictious friend?

If they don't want to watch a full Ed video, here's a link to the Boston Terrier piece on Dogs 101 on AP. http://animal.discovery.com/videos/dogs-101-boston-terrier.html It's not the whole segment, but it's something.

I do feel sorry for your dog. What your parents need is a cat.