so im standing outside starbucks waiting for a friend and a man reaches out to pet my dog and I pull her away. he says oh is she not friendly? Shes a working dog I say. He mutters well she should be labelled then as he storms off. Actually most people ask before petting other peoples dogs I say. He comes back a minute later and says Ive never had anyone not let me pet their dog before, I look up from my phone and kinda laugh saying that's nice. Again he says she should be labelled. I say no she doesn't have to be labelled. He says I shouldn't have her in public then. I say so she shouldn't be in public coz you cant pet her? She has a right to be in public, you don't have a right to touch other peoples property. He then maybe ticked off by my logic and calm demeanor starts getting in my face screaming what a dumb bitch I am and im an ugly nasty bitch, to which I call him a fat pig. He is screaming at me saying I need to grow up and im nasty and I calmly point out hes the middle aged man screaming at a girl, he needs to grow up. Hes walking away continually screaming back how nasty I am and I tell him to get his own dog to pet. I wish I had the sense to record him on my phone as he was quite threatening and in my face and even though I didn't back away I was quite shaken and of course all alone without my fiancée, to which I doubt hed been so bold. He was with a lady too who didn't say anything, too embarrassed perhaps.

Anyway has anyone dealt with this level of upset over not being allowed to pet your dog? What did you say/do? Makes me not want to go there, to my favorite place anymore less I run into him again.

Oh, go back! Bring an airhorn next time

I've run into people like him many times in customer service, never in relation to a dog though. It's Entitlement with a capital E. And for him, probably Narcissism with a capital N.

I'm sorry you had a bad experience, I feel damned sorry for that woman who was with him, hope she has the sense to not be married to him.

When I see someone looking at or moving toward my dog(s), I place myself calmly between the person and the dog(s) and say with a polite half-smile, "Sorry, training, no touch, THANKS!" and I don't engage further. That is, no invitation to discuss or explain.


Engaging is not worth it.

I'm old and experienced. Trust me on this.

Completely agree with Connie. It's just not worth it to try and educate some people.

My issues are more with women for some reason. "Oh, look at the nice dogs" as they're heading straight towards me. Much like Connie, I step towards the on-comers and simply say "They're not pettin' dogs".

Mike Arnold's signature hit home with me years ago and it works for us. Simple, to the point, no explaining. Have had a couple people say, "Oh, so they're not friendly." Nope, didn't say that, they're just not pettin' dogs. You usually hear a harrumph, or huh. But it clicks and they carry on, as do I.

Had a couple of teenage girls call me bitch. All smiles and giggles until they couldn't pet the dogs. Almost like it's an insult. What, I'm not good enough to pet your dog? But that's their issue, not something I'm not willing to engage in.

If people are generally curious or want to converse, as long as they are keeping their distance, I have no problem being friendly. Just no pettin'.

I was literally off to the side with havoc beside me and he came into my space and I had to jerk her behind me off bit off a drop into a flower bed. Ive had many civil conversations about it with people, in fact most people I think hear working and think service dog and apologize, which this guy musta thought since he was going on about her being labelled. There was no not engaging when hes screaming in my face trying to intimidate me. I think me staying calm and laughing at him infuriated him more. Thank god im usually with my fiancée but its just not ok for a man to feel ok yelling at a girl much younger and smaller than him just cox im not accompanied by a bigger man. It had me nervous all night.

What do you guys say if someone says the dog shouldn't be in public?

"What do you guys say if someone says the dog shouldn't be in public?"


I don't talk with the person enough for it to come up.


That said, though, the guy you ran into sounds like a nut.

I try to ignore people like that although I do admit I am out with the dog (used to be dogs) early in the morning to avoid discussion and or confrontation. I am just paranoid enough to believe that you never know when someone in going to take out a gun during such hostilities and I try not to provoke them. I was once called a "bitch" while sitting in my car in a parking lot. You really just have to ignore the "loonie tunes".

Personally, I'd say, Thank you, you're right, many dogs shouldn't be in public. If he expressed further concern saying, No, YOUR dogs shouldn't be in public. Again, I'd say, Thank you, we're just finishing ….. whatever, we'll be on our way.

Further badgering would have me saying something like, If it's truly wrong for someone to be in public and not want "strangers" (with an emphasis on the word strangers) to pet their dogs, I would have no problem obeying that law. Fortunately or unfortunately, there is no such law. I'm not responsible for your perception of me or my dogs, I've simply asked you not to pet them, please. And thank you.

If they still didn't take the hint, I'd probably leave.

And maybe instead of jerking her behind you, step out in front. You're kind of getting in their space then. It's me you're talking to now, not the dogs. Kind of takes that focus off the dogs.

And being a smaller woman myself, I can see how this kind of thing can be intimidating, however our husbands are not always there to protect us. Saying "No" and sticking to your guns in a pleasant manner is a lot safer than engaging in some kind of argument. When in doubt, just leave.

This kind of stuff tends to take care of itself. Bully's like that will engage with the wrong or right person, at some point, with someone more capable of the teaching them the real lesson that needs to be learned.

Oh, and I see you're in Richmond. Happy Canada Day Cat!

thank you! yes heading down to the salmon fest which is scene of the crime yesterday lol. Thx for the good advice, that's right im not responsible for his perception. Its not my job to change his mind, that's an excellent comeback and your right there is no law, what a ridiculous thing to say, all dogs have a right to be walked wether human or dog aggressive, if they are responsibly managed. I usually have the dogs behind me and avoid such encounters very well, its amazing how many more people come up to my fiancée than me to pet the dogs, I use body language and avoid eye contact, most people take a hint. Its not my fault this creep was butthurt he cant pet my dog, good lord. But other than calling him a fat pig which if you are a man wearing a shirt that cant cover your ponch it is piggish, I remained fairly calm though I noticed I was shaking after.

Thanks for letting me vent, I knew you guys would understand.

one more question, any comebacks for is she not friendly? Coz mine is and even if she weren't I wouldn't want people to know, ive come to saying shes nervous, which is neither true. she could care less about pets from strangers.

 Quote: Cat Richter

He then maybe ticked off by my logic and calm demeanor starts getting in my face screaming what a dumb bitch I am and im an ugly nasty bitch, to which I call him a fat pig.

It takes two to tango unless they're a real fruit loop.

I would have just stated it's my choice to limit who my dog interacts with and left it at that. I don't give a reason or excuse. That just invites discussion/argument. If they want to give "advice" I tell them that I'll consider it and move on. I don't refute or agree with it. Reaching for my dog's leash(people have done it) gets a firm "I do not allow other people to handle my dog, thank you".

My mom politely pulled her four dogs off the path and into a sit to let a woman through and the woman decided to just push her stroller right off the path next to the dogs to cut through the park. She suggested that the woman should be aware that not all dog owners have good control of their dogs and that yielding the path to them was to keep everybody safe and the woman called my mom a bitch. Yakking on her cell the whole time BTW.

I should add that my mom has very good control of her pack on walks but she was concerned about this woman just pushing her stroller into a dog packs space while talking on her cell phone. Unfortunately the woman was just oblivious.