Catherine,

I agree with Connie about the resentment part. At least that's what jumps out when I read your post. I don't know the difference between separation anxiety in a dog and a "velcro" dog but since I have what is considered a velcro dog, I can tell you that getting frustrated with the dog only makes it worse. In fact, I even started a thread here asking for ideas on how to get him to stop focusing so much on me.

My dog follows me from room to room, no matter how tired he is or who else is trying to entertain him. He's now 13 months old and as he gets older, he gets more attached in a way but somehow it's different. I'll try to explain:

It's better in that he'll now go for a little bit to another room but it's never more than 10' from me. It's worse in that he really, really wants to be where I am. I found it easier to try to understand him than to try to get freedom. In looking at it from his point of view, my presence was comforting to him and if that's all he's asking for, then I should find a way to see the sweetness in that. Sooo, I worked on that mindset for a little bit. It wasn't too hard and it didn't take long. As this unfolded, he began to follow me a little bit less. I really believe that when I relaxed about his constant presence and began to expect and appreciate it, he fed off this and began to be content in more places away from me. I live in a single family home with 3 floors. He will always make sure to be on the same floor as me for sure. Once in a while, he'll pick another room on that floor for a few minutes but will always manage to work his way back to me rather quickly. He's laying by my feet as I write this <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> .

Take one day at a time and do your best to relax around him. The rest of the advice will have to come from the experts in ways to unglue him from you. Good luck, I know it's hard but baby steps usually works with seemingly big problems!

Before I even read Connie's response, first thought that came to mind is "CRATE!"...

A behaviorist that says a crate will destroy a dog is an idiot in my opinion, a crate creates a safety, a den for the dog to feel safe and comfortable. The crate is a happy secure place. If you give a nervous dog too much open area to roam then they will get increasingly nervous because they don't have the psycological strength to handle all this territory without their leader. Following you room to room I don't see a problem with, my dogs follow me everywere, they want to be with me. But a crate will save your house from destruction, it'll create a safe place for your dog, and it'll save you $50 on a sitter for your dog! I would actually go with a vari-kennel style crate for a dog like that, or if you decide to go with a wire crate, cover the sides roof and back with a towel to kinda create a comfortable enclosed den-like atmosphere for the dog.

Teach the dog that 1) Good things happen in her crate, her crate is never her punishment, it's her happy safe place. Feed that dog in her crate!! and 2) Teach her that when she goes in the crate, it doesn't mean you leave... for the first few days or a week, put her in her crate, then take her out without leaving the room, keep increasing the time she spends in the crate without you leaving the room. You can leave her in her crate and go out if you have to, I don't see a problem with that, but if the dog learns that crate = mommy disappears for hours, then the crate will become a trigger for that. 3) Teach the dog that every time she goes into the crate and you leave, you come back and let her out. Leave the house for 5 minutes, come back, uncrate and praise!

This dog sounds like he/she needs this, and based on what you said, I'll say YOU need it too. I wouldn't waste any more money on sitters and behaviorists if that's the advice they give you. Make sure the dog has something to do in the crate, like it was said before, throw something with your scent in the crate. Go to Target n buy an XXXL t-shirt for $5.99 n sleep in that for a few nights then toss it in the crate with the dog along with some long-lasting toy/bone/kong chew toy so the dog has something to do. If she's a destroyer then don't waste money on a mattress either because the dog will eat those $50 mattresses without a second thought. If you need some kinda liner, I like the ones at EnZKennelFlooring.com.

I dont mean to sound disrespectful, but it seems as though youre almost indifferent to the dog? Obviously,, youve committed financially, but have you emotionally?
Dogs are work, they are dependents-truly. This dog needs you or someone to love him and bond with him. Ive had several dogs that were as you desribed. You couldnt leave their sight. Others were content to sit around the fireplace. Have a drahthaar that follows me to every room in the house and sits on my fit-literally..a true velcro dog. If you dislike that, then I really think the problem is more related to you then the dog. With this dog, I suffered the same moments of unrest and easiness. I actually found her quieted when she had 1 of my dirty socks taken out the laundry(by her) and was settled in her crate. Give the dog a security blanket, toys/chew toy and make sure to wear them out. Most importantly either give em the home they deserve or allow someone else too. These are desireable dogs for many, and an easy rescue if you cant committ more emotionally. Just callin em like I sees em.

Bill, were you meaning to post to Catherine or me? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

 Quote:

how do you leave the house?

Who leaves the house? After she destroyed two doors (and I mean destroyed!), I haven't left her alone in several weeks. My car is a wreck because I can't even step into Starbucks without her going crazy for the 4-5 minutes I'm in the store. I gave up detailing my car as it's money wasted.

Must I now BUY my freedom with sitter fees? Or do I get to have a normally functioning dog one of these days? Must I settle for moderately better or, with dedication, can I look forward to getting my life back?

Seriously, listen to what Connie and the others are saying. You need a crate, that's not just for when you are away, that's for when the dog is eating/sleeping/getting on your nerves. And you will not get the dog comfortable with the crate if you just use it when you go away, so read about crating on this site and apply it.

It's to give you a break, which you look like you need. The dog is controlling you and you are resenting the dog. Exercise it, discipline it, crate it, and then worry about its feelings.

Hi Catherine <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> I can understand your frustration. I have dealt with the same exact thing with my GSD mix from an animal shelter. The dog chewed up every piece of furniture, dozens of pairs of my shoes, and he too chewed through a door when I tried to confine the chewing & destruction to one room. When I would get home, the house would be ransacked, furniture completely moved around the room. Your resentment is understandable. Increase the dogs exercise and crate the dog before you go out and you shouldn't have a problem anymore.

 Quote:

Following you room to room I don't see a problem with, my dogs follow me everywere, they want to be with me.

I appreciate your taking the time to comment but why do people think that just because THEY are OK with being followed from room to room, that such behavior ought to be OK for everyone?

I can't even take a pee without Sandy either coming into the bathroom or scratching to get in. Come on. That's not normal. You'd never tolerate that in a child; why do you tolerate it in a dog?

 Quote:

 Quote:

Following you room to room I don't see a problem with, my dogs follow me everywere, they want to be with me.

I appreciate your taking the time to comment but why do people think that just because THEY are OK with being followed from room to room, that such behavior ought to be OK for everyone?

I can't even take a pee without Sandy either coming into the bathroom or scratching to get in. Come on. That's not normal. You'd never tolerate that in a child; why do you tolerate it in a dog?

Catherine, these people are trying to give you sound advice. Pushing back on it only confirms their suspicions that the best paths for you and your dog are in very different directions.

And I'm happy that my kid follows me from room to room. I'll tolerate that all day long. It's a much better problem than them not following me around at all.

I'm not trying to be stubborn or not listen to your suggestions, but let me get this straight. I'm supposed to take the dog for even more and longer walks (against my own daily schedule) and let her suffer panic attacks in a crate rather than in a room. Should she break off her UPPER front teeth, too, trying to get out of a crate?

As you can see, I'm frustrated beyond belief, both by Sandy's behavior and by suggestions that "all" I have to do is exercise her more and get a crate!

I'm thinkin' DRUGS! For me! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />