Tammy Moore Webboard User Reg: 01-14-2010
Posts: 1564
Loc: USA
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Quote: melissa thom
know you have two kids? One of which under the age of 10? She said Yes, why does that matter?
Is this your sister's first dog since having kids?
You said "one was under 10"... Is the older one the same way? If so, I actually think this is rather old for them to be treating a dog this way,a six year old is borderline, but certainly capable of understanding the rules the first time they are set.
I know you love your sister, but my guess would be that she lacks leadership in her parenting role as well. I would have her, you could help , set up the care, rules, and routine with this puppy, and your sister monitor the interaction with kids/pup, if they screw up, THE FIRST TIME,no access to the dog.
You can only do so much not being there 24/7. The marker training is good, but there will be many hours that they are not training, the kids actually need the obedience training more at this point.
Lynne Barrows Webboard User Reg: 09-22-2007
Posts: 2531
Loc: S. Florida
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Well, I'll put my 2 cents in here. I tend to agree with Leih's post; I'm not sure you are going to be able to change this situation.
Despite that, you can certainly offer, in a non-judgemental way, to help her with setting up guidelines for the kids, housetraining advice, and the beginnings of marker training. If your sister is receptive, get them a clicker and teach them how to load it and do a quick marker training session.
I think the operative word here is 'non-judgemental'. I'm sure you were mortified and teed-off, no doubt, at what you saw happening yesterday. If you alienate your sister you don't stand a chance of helping this pup.
Lindsay Janes Webboard User Reg: 10-24-2005
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Loc: Tucson, Az
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Quote: Melissa Thom
I love my sister but how does one deal with family being so amazingly stupid with their pets and kids?
I truly understand what you are going through. My younger sister and I always get into UGLY fights over how to train our dogs. My sister thinks and assumes her border collie acts, thinks, and plays like humans do. It drives me crazy when she tells me things like that. I don't see dogs as human being, but DOGS!
"It's better to be an optimist who is sometimes wrong than a pessimist who is always right"
Melissa Thom Webboard User Reg: 12-04-2007
Posts: 2781
Loc: Upper Left hand corner, USA
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Quote: Lindsay Janes
Quote: Melissa Thom
I love my sister but how does one deal with family being so amazingly stupid with their pets and kids?
I truly understand what you are going through. My younger sister and I always get into UGLY fights over how to train our dogs. My sister thinks and assumes her border collie acts, thinks, and plays like humans do. It drives me crazy when she tells me things like that. I don't see dogs as human being, but DOGS!
I like a certain amount of civility in my life. Personally if it weren't abusive and completely counterproductive I wouldn't care. My older brother has a sheltie and a dobie mutt who are completely untrained, unkempt, fed pedigree, etc. It doesn't bother me because the dogs are happy, the kids are happy, I don't see any dangerous interactions that stress or threaten injury to the dogs and kids or set unrealistic expectations on them. Their system such as it is works for their level of expectation of the dogs. Who am I to tell them it's wrong when it's working for them?
Melissa Thom Webboard User Reg: 12-04-2007
Posts: 2781
Loc: Upper Left hand corner, USA
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Quote: steve strom
Inter-family things are tough. Any reason why your sister won't listen to you Melissa?
You know... I guess that's the part that's baffling to me. We all have our own thing in life. For me it's always been the animals and agriculture,for my older brother for my knack for numbers and as such is a pretty great tax accountant, my younger brother LOVES booze and all the fun vices in life and as such makes a pretty great trick bartender, my sister is a special ed teacher and a pretty awesome one at that. I've seen her turn kids who are almost completely nonfunctional and unable to communicate into functioning kids able to realistically do things in society. You'd think a puppy and her own kid would be a no brainer? All the concepts are pretty similar.
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Re: Advice needed: Family and their dogs.
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