When I was a kid I really wanted to build a cat house (with a sign that said CAT HOUSE) on the porch for our outside cats. My request was denied. I didn't figure it out until several years later.

Then later, when I was in college, my mom started going to the gym. One day when she was at the mall she ran into one of the other gym members and his wife. She told me that she caught herself just as she was about to say "I almost didn't recognise you with your clothes on", meaning his street clothes rather than his gym clothes. :shocked:

 Quote: amy vandeweerd

Love this thread!
My daughter (then 7) is very much into calves and *kind of* knows how they are made. Upon her teachers announcement of her pregnancy, Chloe raises her hand and says "Congratulations! Was it live cover or AI?" We learned very quickly that much more needed to be explained about tact

OMG! I love it!

Just one more from the heavy tome that chronicles the many cringe worthy moments from my past, not animal related though..

Several years ago at a gig in one of the local pubs, the ex husband was in a band that had a substitute guitarist for the night, a man I couldn't stand, and while I was at the bar, this man was bringing his gear in and shouting in a loud voice, "scuse me, fat boy coming through!" the woman standing next to me says, "I wish he wouldn't keep saying that" I replied, "I know, he is such a PRAT, no one likes him, I wish he would just piss off!" she looks at me blandly and says, "what I meant was, I wish he would stop putting himself down like that, he's my son" I felt my normal defensive grin spread across my face and just said, "is he? great bloke!" and ran to the cover of my friends who like before, melted away leaving me rooted to the spot with the death stares of this woman burning a hole in my head, then to compound my misery, when the band started up, this fatty fat fat comes to the microphone and says he would just like to thank me for the welcome I had given him to the band.....

Did I learn from this? of course not!

Mine isn't dog-related either, but kid-related.

I dated a musician for about ten years, from the time my daughter was about two. This fellow was a great guy (in fact we remain friends to this day) but wasn't always the best influence on my daughter. He had no children, so he wasn't used to censoring himself. Sometimes she would find the worst possible moments to channel his influence.

Especially memorable was a time when my daughter was around four years old and we were visiting my Mom. My Mom is a sweetheart, but from a very conservative, upper-middle-class Catholic background.

When my daughter suddenly passed-gas at the dinner table and started giggling, my mother was horrified. "What do you say, honey?" My mother asked, expecting a demure "excuse me".
What my daughter said instead through a hail of giggles was "Oops...I forgot to say pull my finger".

The look on my mother's face was priceless

Classic! the old ones are always the best!

OMG!

Makes me think of a King of Queens episode where he calls himself Fatty McButterpants.

I have one, also not dog related.

I have a terrible habit of mixing up the first letter of each word in a two word name or phrase, for example; The phrase, "Back in a flash" tends to come out as "Flack in a bash". My kids love this, and tease me CONSTANTLY.

Years ago, I was asked to make an announcement at a church about a lunch we were having after the service...at Fuddruckers...

ROFL

Oh Dear!

I've always thought of myself as a master of faux pas. (I just had to look in the dictionary to make sure I spelled that right LOL.) It's caused me untold embarrassment throughout my life. But listening to your stories, I don't feel quite so alone now.

If I can think of one I wouldn't be to mortified to share, I will. In the meantime, I'm enjoying this thread immensely!