Quote: Jennifer Lee

I dont coddle or encourage or react at all, I just act cheerfully calm and try to send him no big deal vibes down the leash.
I never force him to be touched or approached.

Excellent!

 Quote: connie sutherland

I can't quite recall it, but Cesar Millan has a phrase for this.

"No talk, no touch, no eye contact" !

I dont feel sorry for him at this point,
The only reason I went into the whole history is because she was asking if he was too shy or to pushy..and to answer why I was using those methods.

He is really a totally normal dog 99% of the time and I dont cut him any slack with pack behavior he is treated like any other pup this age would be.

Dealing with this fear issue has been a challenge and sometimes its hard to know where to go next.


Right now he is tethered to the table leg so he doesnt bother my son while he is having a snack and you would think that I had an alien creature in here with all of the moaning and rawooing and being as cute as he can possibly muster. He is just very vocal and has a whole lot of personality

This I ignore and make sure to turn my head and not let him see me when I giggle.

 Quote: connie sutherland

I would add to this that no touch, no eye contact, no nothing* would be what I want from strangers, and that I would ignore his antics for attention and treats with people he does know.

I agree. If he is now begging from strangers that means socialization has taken hold. If they do not give treats any longer he will probably ignore them now. If he goes back to being completely shy then slowly add in people giving him treats.
I think you have to find the right balance with the socialization that works for him.

 Quote: connie sutherland

That hand thing.... I know that many many people will totally disagree with me, but I don't think it's a great move with a shy dog. For one thing, it focuses eyes and attention on him.... it's pressure or expectation that he react, rather than just allowing the dog to become interested (or not) in his own time.

I agree with this to a point. You have to know your dog and it does depend on the individual dog as well.
If you know your dog well enough to know that once the "sniff" is over, then fine. If you have any thoughts that your dog will take a snip at someone, then don't do it. Also, I tell people just to ignore and stand still, then let the dog smell them on his own. The person does not touch, talk or look at the dog.

 Quote: connie sutherland

Getting rid of the jumping up on *you* is easiest. I might turn my back, or step into his space, or walk away with a noise like "phooey" and zero attention. But if your quick breath in his face works, then why not?

Blowing in a dogs face is something I would not recommend. For one, he may get used to it and it will become something you may have to do multiple times to "correct" OR he may get fed up with it and try and bite you in the face.

 Quote: connie sutherland

What Cindy says about not telling people he has had a bad past can be taken even further; I would try to stop saying it to myself as well. That was then and this is now, and the need of a stable pack structure and unwavering leadership trumps any kind of sympathy or extra attention or coddling.

Exactly, telling people about his "past" is just reliving it for all involved. Dogs live in the moment and do not dwell on the past. AND, once you tell someone about it, watch how they react....most likely it is a "Awwww poor doggie...." and their whole presence changes and the dog can sense that, just how he probably senses that you keep his "past" in the back of your mind, therefore enabling him to act like a brat.

 Quote: connie sutherland

I'm very affectionate with my dogs. I'm not saying that affection is inappropriate!

Affection is totally appropriate as long as it is done when the dog is calm and relaxed. If he is keyed up, bothering you to play or give him a treat ect... then he gets nothing.

I'm with Carol. I would push the thoughts of this dog's past out of your head. it really doesn't serve any purpose, and most people tend to use a dog's past history as an excuse for allowing certain behaviors.(whether they even realize it or not) Sorry if this doesn't apply to you, but Ed and I get dozens (the other day I got more than SIXTY) customer emails whose story started out much like yours. I feel like a broken record.

I also wouldn't even allow this puppy to be sniffing peoples hands to get a treat. I just don't see a purpose for that either. If he is nervous about strangers, then let him just hang out with you and stay in your protective bubble. As he gets older and more confident,(because you haven't allowed him to get into situations where he has gotten spooked) I think you will see a big change. I am totally against luring shy dogs to people with food, always have been.

I liked your question about the barking. Did I miss the answer? Not often but at times my boy will get vocal. I am not at all crazy about barking dogs!!!!

Should you correct? Ignore? With ALL unwanted behavior I have a hard time deciding when to just redirect and when to correct???

Well we went to the park three times this weekend..and i have discovered something new.

It has been really cold and wet out lately and so his walks and visits with the afterschool moms had been reduced for a while.

At the park he was just fine with the people we saw, he wagged his tail for them and on his own sniffed feet and gave them a little nose bump which for him is a greeting. He didnt act like an idiot being obnoxious about not getting a treat so maybe that was just one of those weird puppy phases

He was totally normal and ideally behaved.

The only time he startled was when a boy who looked around 10 came running wildly with a branch in his hands over his head yelling in his general direction, But once he realized the boy wasnt running at him, he was fine..total time from startle to recovery was under 30 seconds.

He even did well with the other dogs their and several of them were huge labs off leash, friendly but big goobery goofy labs, he just wanted to play with them but I didnt let him off leash because they were so much bigger.

Then we went by my parents house, He would not go near my dad instead he stayed across the room and barked at him a little before going to sleeo on my feet and only sniffed my moms foot for a minute before coming back to me.

So I think the socialization was going better than I thought and for some reason he is not a fan of those two

They arent mean scary people at all but they certainly arent dog people. I wonder if he somehow senses that.
Their poor dog is left outside alone and is lonely and not very happy.

Seriously, she is like 18 and during the last bitterly cold winter storm she got soaking wet and was freezing cold, shivering, and moving like her whole body hurt and my dad said she could not come inside because she would pee on the floor.....they dont have carpet. They do love her in their own way but have no idea what even the basic needs of a dog really are (obviously)

They were just going to leave her outside with an extra pad in her doghouse but I pitched a fit and made my mom take her to the vet to be boarded until it warmed up some, not to mention warm towels from the dryer to do something as simple as dry her off.

ok end of vent
But I think my worry was somewhat misplaced and that makes me happy and relieved.

Except for the fact that they own the lake house and bringing a dog along who doesnt like them will be a bit of a problem in the summer.

Which means lots of money spent on a dogsitter or boarding and a missed opportunity for weekends out of the city with lots of doggy stuff to do for him If i cant get this figured out.

As I watch him sleep on his organic cotton bed with a kong and two stuffed animals along with a peice of shredded newspaper in his brand new collar after eating Bison and Salmon with potatoes for dinner and a 2 mile walk this morning I certainly do not feel sorry for him. He has a good happy fullfilling life and all the love and care he needs.

He really is a totally normal pup 95% of the time and certainly is not fearful or reserved or stand off ish with us, he is typical naughty pain in the butt puppy.

Hi Jennifer, just a little OT question, do you walk your pup 2 miles on his own and do a separate walk with your adults, or do you also walk the other adult dogs at the same time?

This question is for Cindy, on Ed's puppy 8 weeks to 8 months he specifically says that if the puppy is shy you should ask strangers to give him treats. Now you don't agree with this so I am wondering what the alternative method would be, just ask strangers to ignore him? My puppy will hackle and bark at distant people on our walk and if we have to walk past them he will shy off trying to get as far from them as the leash allows. What do you mean about protective bubble?

The adults dont get as many walks as the pup, The pup and loki combined is just too much for me, Im not strong enough to reliably hang on to both if there is an emergency or aggressive dog nearby.
Nico gets too sore if she does too much, but she does go for short walks late at night off leash and loves it.
So I walk the pup almost daily if its nasty out they are much shorter walks.
Our two mile walk in the morning generally takes nearly an hour because we go at his pace most of the time and stop to sniff or watch or whatever.

Sometimes we go on much shorter but much faster walks a couple of times a day, literally up the block and back at jogging speed but walking. These really help the totally crazy and out of control moments.

Loki generally goes on 3 or so walks a week, but when my husband is in town he gets one everyday, Because we both go and take both dogs or I can go at night when my son is in bed and take one and then come back and trade out for the other.