Connie Sutherland wrote 01/29/2010 03:49 PM a bad day #263702 - 01/29/2010 03:49 PM
Connie Sutherland Moderator Reg: 07-13-2005 Posts: 31571 Loc: North-Central coast of California Offline	Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an e-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station that was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won. Hi Sue, Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature..It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my whole suit with warm water.. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. With in a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it.. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my butt. I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say, I aborted the dive.. I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut. So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt. Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad day? May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!!!
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Melissa Thom wrote 01/29/2010 04:16 PM Re: a bad day [Re: Connie Sutherland ] #263703 - 01/29/2010 04:16 PM
Melissa Thom Webboard User Reg: 12-04-2007 Posts: 2781 Loc: Upper Left hand corner, USA Offline	At least no one peed on it. XD
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Michael_Wise wrote 01/29/2010 04:19 PM Re: a bad day [Re: Melissa Thom ] #263704 - 01/29/2010 04:19 PM
Michael_Wise Webboard User Reg: 07-10-2006 Posts: 4454 Loc: Arkansas Offline	That'll definitely put things in perspective.
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Barbara Schuler wrote 01/29/2010 04:36 PM Re: a bad day [Re: Michael_Wise ] #263709 - 01/29/2010 04:36 PM
Barbara Schuler Webboard User Reg: 01-15-2009 Posts: 5090 Loc: Lanexa Virginia Offline	It probably didn't rank too high on the jellyfishes' "best day ever" list either!!!
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Dennis Jones wrote 01/29/2010 04:42 PM Re: a bad day [Re: Barbara Schuler ] #263716 - 01/29/2010 04:42 PM
Dennis Jones Webboard User Reg: 06-13-2004 Posts: 3389 Loc: Richmond Va Offline	EEEWWWWWW, Sea Critters in your shorts, and every body knows about it now
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Connie Sutherland wrote 01/29/2010 04:44 PM Re: a bad day [Re: Barbara Schuler ] #263717 - 01/29/2010 04:44 PM
Connie Sutherland Moderator Reg: 07-13-2005 Posts: 31571 Loc: North-Central coast of California Offline	Quote: barbara schuler It probably didn't rank too high on the jellyfishes' "best day ever" list either!!! Now that's a Gary Larson point of view if I ever heard one.
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Melissa Thom wrote 01/29/2010 04:46 PM Re: a bad day [Re: Dennis Jones ] #263719 - 01/29/2010 04:46 PM
Melissa Thom Webboard User Reg: 12-04-2007 Posts: 2781 Loc: Upper Left hand corner, USA Offline	Quote: Dennis Jones EEEWWWWWW, Sea Critters in your shorts, and every body knows about it now But in the process you have obtained the best inappropriate dinner conversation topic ever.
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Barbara Schuler wrote 01/29/2010 04:47 PM Re: a bad day [Re: Connie Sutherland ] #263721 - 01/29/2010 04:47 PM
Barbara Schuler Webboard User Reg: 01-15-2009 Posts: 5090 Loc: Lanexa Virginia Offline	Quote: connie sutherland  Quote: barbara schuler It probably didn't rank too high on the jellyfishes' "best day ever" list either!!! Now that's a Gary Larson point of view if I ever heard one. I always root for the underdog... or the team whose quarterback has the best butt.
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Connie Sutherland wrote 01/29/2010 04:51 PM Re: a bad day [Re: Melissa Thom ] #263723 - 01/29/2010 04:51 PM
Connie Sutherland Moderator Reg: 07-13-2005 Posts: 31571 Loc: North-Central coast of California Offline	Quote: Melissa Thom  Quote: Dennis Jones EEEWWWWWW, Sea Critters in your shorts, and every body knows about it now But in the process you have obtained the best inappropriate dinner conversation topic ever. No no, my daughter has this one beat with her 1970s news story of an elderly dog owner dead of a heart attack in his NYC apartment, hot summer, bloated body bursting at the seams, dogs in the home having run out of food ..... I'll just say that the dogs survived just fine. Her favorite story, I think.
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Melissa Thom wrote 01/29/2010 04:59 PM Re: a bad day [Re: Connie Sutherland ] #263727 - 01/29/2010 04:59 PM
Melissa Thom Webboard User Reg: 12-04-2007 Posts: 2781 Loc: Upper Left hand corner, USA Offline	Quote: Connie Sutherland  Quote: Melissa Thom  Quote: Dennis Jones EEEWWWWWW, Sea Critters in your shorts, and every body knows about it now But in the process you have obtained the best inappropriate dinner conversation topic ever. No no, my daughter has this one beat with her 1970s news story of an elderly dog owner dead of a heart attack in his NYC apartment, hot summer, bloated body bursting at the seams, dogs in the home having run out of food ..... I'll just say that the dogs survived just fine. Her favorite story, I think. I guess I should have clarified fancy dinner inappropriate talk vs inappropriate bar talk... *barf* Yes I've heard a similar story involving a crazy cat lady who had a stroke.
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