Trust your instinct, you are in the best position to whats right for your dogs and your mum, plus you are not a novice, its probably not going to be a walk in the park, but you know this already, I'm sure you will make the right decision for all concerned, I wish you all the best

 Quote: connie sutherland

" I know of 3 good homes off hand who are pet free and would take my Golden, Bella in a heart beat so I could take Tanner and save him. I know Bella would be much happier as an only dog, but she is mine and I don't know what to do. I love Tanner as I would my own .... "

I would do that.

And if Bella can be visited occasionally, I can tell you as a foster person that no, it's not "confusing." The dog (IMHO) comes to accept that s/he has an extended family and home, to put human terms to a hard-to-explain thing. No abandonment, no desertion ..... and of course always keep visits very upbeat and matter-of-fact and cheerful. And the dog is happy to see the "old" people and also happy to remain with the "new" ones.

I second that.

It's not going to be easy, but for the betterment of the dog in both situations it sounds like the right thing to do IMO.

I'm still really thinking on this one. It's so hard because I can think of a situation where each of my dogs could be happier. I'm an over analyzer. Dieks would love a man to be his primary handler- no interest in me if there is ANY guy around. Even if I have a steak AND he is the newest edition. Had a known a month ago Tanner would need me the decision to adopt may have been different.
Then Haz, he is the absolute perfect fit for our family but I'm sure a house where he was worked with every hour would be his ideal (not that doesn't get a ton of attention but still...) And Bella who "tolerates" the young ones but only has one true close dog friend- Tanner I just don't know how to choose one dog over the other. I know Haz is staying, as he is the happiest here and will bounce back from any household changes, but the other two are evenly questionable right now. Dog that doesn't love other dogs or dog that is (as of now) unreliable with kids and could really take me or leave me. I'm going to need to be medicated after this decision.

Just a few thoughts -

Yes, every dog might be happier if they are with us 24/7, get to work all the time, something in our life might be different, etc. In reality, this is rarely the case. People have lives, too and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that! Dogs adjust really well to the circumstances they are given provided their needs are met. A good owner should not feel guilty over what they can't give their dog.

What do you want out of this whole situation? Yup as you figure this whole thing out you should consider you needs and wants, too. It's okay!

As you consider Dieks place in all of this, keep in mind that you haven't had enough time to build a bond with him. That takes weeks/months in many cases. Sheesh, Kipp could have really cared less about me for the first couple of months. It took real work to build a bond with him.

Have you considered trying to keep all for now and see how it goes? I'm in a similar situation where I know one of my dogs would be happier if she went back, a plane flight away, to my father (and my father would be so so happy to have her back); but mentally, its so hard knowing I wont be able to see her every day and snuggle whenever I want. So I definitely know what you're going through. We have pets so we can enjoy them everyday. And as much as we all love animals, during hard times, you have to do what is best for you and your mother (to echo what Mara said)

Give the golden to your Mother and take Tanner home with you?
Unless your mother is going into a nursing home, she might like to keep a dog (a gentle easy going dog) around. Company, someone to eat with etc.

After doing some evaluation, I have made my decision. All 3 homes for Bella have fallen through. After evaluating the list of "needs" - pretty basic ones in my opinion (quality food, regular grooming, contract to return her in the event they could no longer provide her medical care, issues arose etc.)2 families decided they could not handle it. Just when you think you know people... And the other had just rescued a DA mix.
We did couple short walk sessions with Tanner and Dieks this week. To say they disliked one another is an understatement. Tanner exhibits signs of high stress and he just can't handle that in his new home, regardless of whether they are never together, even the scent of Dieks on me made him tremble and pee. Because I know Tanner will need a lot of quiet and stability with no real reasons to stress, I have decided that Dieks will be finding a new home. He needs more than what I will be able to give hime once Tanner enters the picture. I am trying desparately to find a breed rescue to take him because many times the HS will give the dogs to them. It would be so much nicer if I knew he was going to be in a foster home instead of a cell. That part is killing me. The only GSD rescue even remotely close (500 mile round trip) is full. I offered to transport, but you can't make fosters magically appear, unfortunately. I'm not going to dwell, or "poor me" anymore about it. I need to get Tanner here, so I will search for rescue until Thursday, if none is found, he will have to go back so he can begin his search again. I think I might be lying about not dwelling, but I'm going to try.

Is it okay to spread the word to other forums, etc to see if we can help find a foster (or home) fo him?

Yes please do! I would love some help and this is the only forum I belong to. Please feel free to link my photobucket account and give out my email. http://s1215.photobucket.com/albums/cc517/amy_vandeweerd/

amy_vandeweerd@yahoo.com

A little background to be helpful:
Dieks is 15 months old, former chained backyard dog. He has come miles in just the last month, quickly learning sits, downs, short stays and basic house manners. He has never had an accident or been destructive to anything but his tug toys. He may do best with children over 8 as he is still learning how to interact with small people. Dieks loves biking, car rides, playing ball, playing tug and jumping onto and over obstacles. He is very athletic, has a want to learn and loves trying new things. He is said to dislike cats, but I have not seen this firsthand, as we don't own any. He does well in his crate and in a fenced back yard. He has the ability to jump a 6 foot fence, but stays after he gets to know his boundries. He is just a wonderful all around dog. He is neutered, microchipped and utd on all shots. He is thin, but gaining weight, has a healthy report 3 weeks ago from the vet. Please contact if you have any questions.

 Quote:

It would be so much nicer if I knew he was going to be in a foster home instead of a cell.

I'm confused, are you planning on giving him to a shelter is you can't find a home or a rescue to take him?