It is a scenario I am trying and failing to get over to them, these 2 illnesses are the ones I read about consistently when I read up on both breeds.

Huge vet bills they will have to suck up if anything critical occurs.

I will be willing the pup on to a full, purposefully and healthy life, and keeping everything crossed...

I recently threw a "shitfit" when my nephew's girlfriend was planning on purchasing a Pom puppy from the petstore. Think I finally got my point across when I swiftly informed both of them that this puppy would not be welcome in my home...my nephew lives with me and on occasion, his GF will spend a weekend here with her current Pom. It would have seriously interrupted their lives. We won't mention that she was intending on breeding this pup with her current Pom...who has had surgery to correct luxating patellas....which is HEREDITARY!

My hubby often has to remind me that not everyone takes dogs as seriously as I do. But...I have a big mouth and I will always take the dog's side!

 Quote: Connie Sutherland

 Quote: tracey holden

... I will be giving them unsolicited advice on Sunday, though I know it won't go down very well, but I have to try anyway

http://n8tip.com/the-hamburger-method-of-constructive-criticism-works-for-vegetarians-too

Also, a big list of DOs and DON'Ts is nowhere near as effective as one per occasion. And asking if THEY have any questions, along the lines of "I hope I can help without offending anyone. Maybe you have questions or concerns you want to ask me about?"

And if it can be worked in naturally (not an obviously phony setup), maybe you can ask one of them for a bit of instruction or advice. "I love this dessert! Any chance of getting the recipe?" or, even better, if at all possible, a compliment on something they have done with the puppy. "That's a perfect dog bed!"

The last thing you want is for them to completely tune you out.

Trust me. I know all about being a didactic and bossy know-it-all. I'm the eldest of seven kids!

Jamie went from living with an over bearing, dominant, autocratic Mother, to a girlfriend with the same attributes so he has had plenty of straight talking throught out his 25 years! now the little sod is a man he has become audacious with his riposte, and I am really struggling with it

I wonder if we might not be related somewhere along the line.....

OK it sounds like because of their lifestyle they don't need another dog. Now if it has the Dane temperament, its may get along ok. As for health problems, I would be more worried if it was a purebred of those breeds than a cross. The biggest concern in that mix would be like any other big dog, bloat, hip displacia. Those two.

People often think I am 10 yrs younger than I am and they talk down to me, people often think I am much older than they if they don't see me and only hear what I say...I get more respect...very ironic. I know he's your little brother and you want to protect him because you love him. ;-) I have a little brother too, but he's only 2 yrs younger...still lol.

If he was my brother I would be there for him to give solicited advice if needed. If you apologize he may be willing to take you up on that and think of what good it would do for the pup! :-) I'm sure deep down he knows that you know a lot. Now go meet that puppy! LOL

"As for health problems, I would be more worried if it was a purebred of those breeds than a cross."


Me too.

Tresa, he's my son, not my little brother unsolicited advice goes with the territory - it's in the parental contract, and apologize?? are you mad? can't have him thinking his Mama is going soft in her old age

I am going to give him the tome like pup and breed folder that my friend and the BB's breeder gave us, it has loads of do's and dont's about bloat prevention, joint damage prevention, feeds etc, then I will encourage him to tell me how it's going; they are going to be using my vets for his vacs and checks, which is great, because it is literally across the road from my house and I know them all really well in there.

One thing I have stepped in and insisted on though is, after they told me they were calling him Albert, which I could have lived with, and changing it to Godfrey, I told him, given our family's propensity for shortening names, I was not going to tolerate calling "God, God, come here you little toad!" when I catch him up to no good, so I have chosen Ptolemy, 'Tolly' for short, much better than Godfrey, or 'God'!!

Jamie likes it, and as it was a name Alison already liked, I think that's what he will now be called.

Going over to meet my first Granddog on Sunday, will post some pics

Tracey;
Please forgive me for offering people advice in a dog forum, but I have had a non-related experience that parallels what you are going through. This hits much too close to home. I hope this doesn't irk you, but I must say...

My grown son moved out of my house when he was 19yo because he was tired of my criticism. He didn't have a decent job (quit the part-time he had to move away; he's still working part-time as a shortorder cook), a car or insurance, nor did he have his own bed. He was just ready to be his own man. Thankfully, as time passed, our relationship mended, but he still didn't communicate as much as I would like. He now has a wife and a baby on the way. This turn of events has awakened his desire to keep in touch with me, as he knows that I want to be part of my grandbaby's life. However, I still walk on shaky ground, because I know that if I offer unsolicited advice about his life or family, I will lose not only him again, but also any chance I have to know my grandchildren.
When he called me to tell me I was going to be Paw-paw, he was excited, and I was so happy he was sharing with me again. Naturally, I was worried about him fathering a family in his current situation (that I don't consider the most stable), but I sucked it up and found a way to offer my concerns and my help in a way that he wasn't offended by. But for the grace of God, it has worked, and we are closer than we have been since he was a teenager.
Sometimes we have to step back and let our children figure things out for themselves. A little support in this instance may get you a lot further and help the pup more than trying to force your son to accept your ideals.
Best wishes!

 Quote: Connie Sutherland

Also, a big list of DOs and DON'Ts is nowhere near as effective as one per occasion. And asking if THEY have any questions, along the lines of "I hope I can help without offending anyone. Maybe you have questions or concerns you want to ask me about?"

And if it can be worked in naturally (not an obviously phony setup), maybe you can ask one of them for a bit of instruction or advice. "I love this dessert! Any chance of getting the recipe?" or, even better, if at all possible, a compliment on something they have done with the puppy. "That's a perfect dog bed!"

The last thing you want is for them to completely tune you out.

LOL! Where did I get brother? Geez. Oh well.

Ooops...Umm well I guess just try not to make him mad or resistant. As hard as it is, maybe wait for him to ask you (unless its very serious...life or death!). Cuz I think of it this way: I hate my mom telling me what's right even if it is...she can't make choices for me but tries to. The thing is, kid remember the times you were wrong during these discussions and get defensive.

As for the name....THAT would be my biggest concern!!! LOL Get over here God, God sit! Anything but Godfrey!

I KNOW

And Duane, truthfully we are very close, but we have some MONUMENTAL arguments! It's the East end of London with the Irish blood in us, I love the bones of the boy, and he is devoted to me, that's why we can be SO blunt and honest with each other, neither of us pull our punches

But I do appreciate your post, it was very nice of you to take the time to make a valid point